I think that is why I was so satisfied in Charlotte. I got back what I had given. I had put in a lot. It had taken a very long time. So it is scary to be at a point in life where you look around and realize all the hard work it took before. You also realize how easy it has been. Well, not so much easy, but at the least, in a very short amount of time.
I can't help but feel cared for here in Boston. My friend Steve calls me pretty much every day. My buddy Rich called me on Thanksgiving from New York, to wish me well and mentioned my birthday (without my reminding him). He said that him and our friend Mike would like to take me out to dinner. Johanna has offered to organize (by way of making reservations) brunch at my favorite fancy restaurant in the South End, Stella's. I have an employee that put in their notice and brought me 4 Cannoli because she heard me mention my PASSION for them. Another brings me leftovers to try and help me save money, and he also gave me one of his old suits that doesn't fit him anymore. In less than a year I feel engrossed in a mass of people who care dearly for me. I feel loved.
It feels good to have left Charlotte in a state of almost uncertainty and have now arrived more sure of myself than I had ever imagined I would be before.
I know that money problems are smoothing out as we speak. I know that eventually the economy will turn. When it happens, I will be that much more satisfied.
Tonight I began watching "The Family Stone". When I first saw the movie, it became an instant classic in my mind. I had no idea that it would be such a heart-shaking movie. It dealt with a mother whose Breast Cancer had returned. It makes me thankful that my mother is a survivor. It makes me cry to think what life would be like without her. There is another scene in which an outsider from the family (aka Sarah Jessica Parker future daughter-in-law to be) makes a comment about gay people. The comment is slightly offensive, and she keeps digging the ditch deeper trying to pull herself out of it but makes it worse. Craig T. Nelson plays the perfect role of the father that slams his fist on the table and demands, "THATS ENOUGH!". The movie is about a less than ordinary family that knows good and well that they all have problems. The tie that binds is that they are family. They accept each other no matter what their differences are. This scene in which Craig T. Nelson (aka COACH) takes charge is followed up by the mother (Diane Keaton another A+ choice for the role) aggressively and passionately tells her gay son, "HEY! You are MORE NORMAL than any asshole at this table!"
Aside from my sexual orientation, I have done a great many things that I can think of in which my family could have chosen to abandon me. To disown me even. It makes me think of the woman that I met on Thanksgiving day whose family disowned her for her weight. She has problems. We all do. Her family chose to abandon her instead of holding her up and supporting her in order to help her overcome her problems. Not even to help her, but they are not even there for her to say "I love you" even IF they disagree with every single choice she has ever made. And I just think. Those choices are JUST to put food in her mouth. Once we got her mind off of things it was time for dessert. I asked which dessert she wanted, and she laughed and said "I'll have one of everything". I felt like saying "thats the spirit!". But I knew that it was not a habit that should be encouraged.
It makes me so thankful to be a part of a family that accepts me. and. Loves me.
These are the important things. That make a family, just that. A Family.
Love.
Silent Nights and Holy Nights...
1 comment:
I love you.
Post a Comment