Twenty Seven

I can't believe I am almost 27 years old.  I remember when I was 21 and felt the need to lie about my age.  I told people I was 27.  What was it about being 27 that was so intriguing for me at such a young age.  Now, granted, there are only 6 years that separate the two ages from one another, but it feels like a life time of lessons learned in between the two.  

It seems like no matter how old you get people still refuse to take you seriously no matter what age you are.  I find that I still feel it necessary to lie about my age from time to time.  I tell people I am 33.  An Odd number is more believable than an even one.  Also.  Getting over the 30 year hump is the make or break difference between a gay guy that is still looking and a gay guy that is ready to settle down.  This is, at least, how most over 30 gays view things.  I don't really understand why I just can't seem to find anybody on my side of the 30 year old fence to date or settle down with.  

It seems like the guys my age that are interested are rail thin.  They have no meat on their bones.  They guys that are thicker want thinner guys and the guys that are muscular want OLDER muscular guys.  They go after the older muscle guys who have reached a point of frustration in their lives of being rejected that they are no okay with taking steroids.  Or Hydroxycut.  This is what results in the form of an old face with a young body.  I see it on so many online dating profiles.  First of all.  You know something is wrong when I am pretty much only seeing pictures of peoples body parts.  Most of which are vulgar.  The others are showcasing what would seem like a lot of hard work through diet an exercise but is actually just the result of a crystal meth addiction and a jones for diet pills and steroids.

I don't get it.  All my life I have been longing to grow old gracefully.  Now I look around me and there are all these guys who are too caught up in their physical image.  

The guys my age with bodies like these are either blessed with that genetic disposition, or are lucky enough to have not hit that point in life when you reach a certain age and your body just doesn't respond to everything the same way it used to.  Instead of being able to keep the weight off you only seem to be gaining more of it by the minute.  You begin to find that you are too tired after work to partake in the workouts that had once kept you thin and you find yourself straining to button your low rise jeans.

It's a damn shame that you can't just be surrounded by people that want to wallow in your wake.  It would be nice to find a group of people who enjoyed living life and being happy.  

Just that.  Being happy.  Nothing More.  Nothing Less.