The search continues and I am secretly lonely. Lonely because I want someone to hold on to at night. Lonely because it would be really nice to have someone to wake up with on a Sunday morning. You know. More often than just one random Sunday morning.
All those little cute things that about a boy that turns you on are really starting to get to me. There was a guy at the store the other night. Shopping. He came out of the fitting room and was waiting on some more shirts to try on, then when he headed back towards it, his jeans were sagging, just enough to be sexy and not so much too look sloppy. You could see his boxer briefs bunching at the top of his jeans waistband. SO SEXY! I want a boyfriend that has that. Just so I can rest my hands on his waist at the top of his waistline, and just flirtatiously feel the waistband and cotton from his boxer briefs. Also so that after our date night. (we would have many even after we had become an item) We would go back to his place (because it would have a view overlooking the Back Bay (my favorite part of the city). He would pour some wine, and meet me on the terrace. (I of course would be looking at my favorite view). He would smirk, and I would smile. Then he would tell me "I'll be right back" and come back without his shirt on so that I could flirt a little more with his waistband. He would know that it drove me crazy. I would love this about him. The way he chose to drive me crazy. Because in turn it drove him crazy. It made him absolutely nuts to turn me on and to make me happy.
This is what my relationship would look like.
If I had one. But I don't.
I don't understand why it is so hard. I feel like Charlotte York "WHERE IS HE???"
My birthday is next week. I will be single. I have reached the point in the year when it is not enough time before Christmas to find someone to date that would buy you anything worth while by the time the holiday rolled around.
I guess I will just ask for a big pillow this year.
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